Americans may not have realized it before, but Pope Benedict XVI (did the NFL steal this number thing from the Pope?) is a baseball fan. The reason for his U.S. visit is obvious: He came to commemorate the 100th anniversary of “Take Me Out to the Ball Game.”
On Thursday the Pope went to the Nationals’ stadium, and on Sunday he will go to Yankee Stadium. So he will have visited one National League and one American League stadium, leaving baseball fans anxiously awaiting a Papal pronouncement on the Designated Hitter.

While in Washington, the Pope spent a considerable amount of time with the former owner of the Texas Rangers (formerly the Washington Senators). President Bush and Pope Benedict, we are told, discussed several matters of mutual interest: likely the finer points of the splitter, the curve, and the change up — the latter two being specialties of the former Ranger owner, known in some quarters as The Great Deceiver.
To be clear, the Pope’s trip to Nationals Park was a polite formality. Not wanting to offend his hosts in the nation’s capital, and understanding that they wanted to show off the new stadium, he consented.
But a true baseball fan like Pope Benedict realizes that Washington, now hosting its third major league franchise, is no more than the Avignon of baseball, while the Montreal Expos are being held hostage in exile by the forces of a sinister cabal of dark princes, led by Bud Selig, the man who would be pope.
Benedict is also fully cognizant of the fact that he will visit the Vatican of baseball, the Grand Green Cathedral known as Yankee Stadium. It is The House That Ruth Built — Babe Ruth, that is, not the lesser-known Ruth of Old Testament fame. The Pope understands the significance of this faux biblical allusion.
Pope Benedict will be hosted by baseball’s one true pope, George Steinbrenner. Naturally we can expect a reenactment of the opening line of the book of Genesis, as the Yankees will have a big inning in honor of the Holy Father.
It is also expected that Benedict and George will reaffirm one another’s infallibility in an appropriate pre-game ceremony adjacent to Monument Park, beyond centerfield. It is, dare we say, a match made in heaven.
So let me be the first to say to Benedict XVI, “Play Ball!” As a matter of fact, let’s play two! And, by the way, we have an opening in our fantasy league, if you can work it into your busy schedule.